New Year Resolutions

I have always been a person for lists…when i was young i had a notebook full of things i wanted to accomplish within my life. I’m scared now to look back at those notebooks….hahahaa. This year I wanted to make a different type of list…instead of things like “never eat sugar” or “read that one book thats 800 pages long” I thought I’d make goals that are much more realistic..and meaningful with some help fromf riends…. In a year from today..let’s read this and see how many of these “goals” I get to.:) I like to have a “resolution” for every year I’ve been around…as I figure the older I get, the more I ought to know ..and the more I know..the more I see I need to change things.
1. “Aim at heaven, and you will get earth ‘thrown in’. Aim at earth and you will get neither.” C.S. lewis

2. “Never say you will pray about a thing; pray about it.” Oswald Chambers

3. ” Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you, all things are passing. God never changes.”  St. Teresa of Avila

4 & 5. , “ Henri Nouwen once asked Mother Teresa for spiritual direction. Spend one hour each day in adoration of your Lord, she said,and never do anything you know is wrong. Follow this and you’ll be fine.”

― John Eldredge

6. Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.
Abraham Lincoln

7.
Everyone should be respected as an individual, but no one idolized.
Albert Einstein

8.The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.
Audrey Hepburn

9.Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.
Bill Cosby

10 & 11. : A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous.
Coco Chanel

12. For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.
Nelson Mandela

13. I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

14. Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it.
Oprah Winfrey

15. Be obscure clearly. (hahaha)
E. B. White

16.Since there is nothing so well worth having as friends, never lose a chance to make them.
Francesco Guicciardini

17.“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to be over, it’s about learning how to dance in the rain.” - Author Unknown

18. ”I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself.” -  Mikhail Baryshnikov

19.“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” Jesus 

I know I will not succeed in all of these..but I will truly try to take advice from these wise ones..I’d love to hear what your goals for the new year is…..HAPPY NEW year my loves! <3

Reflection 2011 :)

“The prayer power has never been tried to its full capacity. If we want to see mighty wonders of divine power and grace wrought in the place of weakness, failure and disappointment, let us answer God’s standing challenge, “Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things which thou knowest not!’” (J. Hudson Taylor) 

 

Psalm 8:3-5

New International Version (NIV)

³ When I consider your heavens, 
   the work of your fingers, 
the moon and the stars, 
   which you have set in place, 
⁴ what is mankind that you are mindful of them, 
   human beings that you care for them?^[a]

 ⁵ You have made them^[b] a little lower than the angels^[c] 
   and crowned them^[d] with glory and honor.

 

I’m a pretty analytic person, searching for meaning in everything I encounter. 

I also tend to wear my heart on my sleeve. Love with reckless abandon. 

These two things are perhaps both my greatest weakness and strength. They bring me both joy and sorrow. My heart is always at war with my brain and my gut, but all of this disappears when I come to the feet of God. His love always eases my weary soul. 

 

This Christmas season, I have been doing a lot of reflection(haha December always does this to me). Jesus knows all too well of the war of the human condition, He became one of us, that first Christmas all those years ago. Not only did he play a part in our creation, but he has walked among us, cried with us, laughed with us and knows that sometimes we just need to be held. That’s it. To know we are loved, that we matter. He had dark days here on earth, and bright ones.  I know there are times when I feel as God, Jesus, must think I am so silly, my little struggles, are nothing in comparison to the JOY that comes from knowing Him. Yet He is constantly reminding me…He gets it. He loves me in it. 

“For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace” Isaiah 9:6

 

“Jesus wept.” John 11:35

Oh he understands our heartaches and joys completely. 

He came to the world, so bridge the gap that the fallen world had created between us and God. So we could know forgiveness, peace, love, freedom from ourselves and the chains of the worlds hardships…so we could have arms to fall into every day. We are never alone. Everything happens for a reason, beyond what we can see. 

 

I’m still broken, still a sinner, still full of doubts, still search for my security in the wrong places…i’m still completely human…but all I have to do..is close my eyes and He scoops me up..and once again none of that matters… I can surrender alllllllll the good, bad and ugly. 

“For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:30

I never want to be someone that pushes my faith onto anyone….it’s not about religion, rules or a way of life…it’s about a love story.  Everyone has a story…sometimes it takes time to see that it is truly a beautiful love story..a woven tapestry. Growing up, I went through a lot of hard things, and He rescued me from them all. He made me the person I am through them. He protected me, when no one else was. He does that still. When people fail me, His love prevails. When my body is weak He is strong. When I’m angry…He waits for me..and calms my heart. When I feel like I have forsaken Him…He lifts my head and restores me to Him, no matter how many times I fall away. 

 

Tonight I am setting aside my weakness and my strength…not gonna think about who I am..what I am…what I mean…instead I’m just gonna be here in awe..on my knee’s..tears rimming my eyes..of the love of my God..to come to earth ..as a babe…live the life of an innocent man..and die and rise again…to love us.

 

Joy to the World..peace on earth..goodwill towards men. <3

 

 

 

 

Why I Dancce.

I was asked recently, “do you think you will always dance?” and my immideiate answer was, “Yes.”  I begun thinking about what it is aboout West Coast Swing that holds such a hold over most of us who have discovered it.  To an outsider they may think we are all about competing, about who is the best, (which may be the case for some..but I don’t think it is the draw for most..it’s not for me). Competing is a huge part of this dance world, but there is so much more.

 

I love losing myself in a moment:nothing but you, your dance partner and the music matters. The silly problems that haunt our thoughts, suddenly disiapear. Dance is a gifit from God, a way to experience joy and share it with someone else. In the moments when I wish I was as good “as that person” yadayada, I always go back to this, something I learned back when I was into martial arts, “never compete with anyone but yourself. it’s about pushing yourself past what you think you are capable. you will never cease to surprise yourself. There is always someone better than you, but there is someone better than them, you will never be happy if you are trying to be better than everyone else..be better than YOURSELF. You will always have something to learn.”

 

I think the next pull is..the people. I have never met such an ecclectic group of people! We are all so different, yet drawn together and formed some of the most unlikely friendships. I have friends from all over the country and world, and am always meeting new wonderful and interesting people. I love how everyone (for the mostt part, i’m not saying this group of people is without it’s drama, what group is?) is supporting of their friends. I started dancing in highschool, and am STILL friends with the people I danced with then, and we are apart of eachothers lives. I can’t say that for a lot of the people I knew from highschool. That says a lot doesn’t it?  I hope to treasure these friends, forever.

 

There is also a magical feeling that comes once in a while, when it’s 4 in the morning and you are running on pure adrenaline and love for dance, you have a perfect dance. The connection , the music, the hits, the partner, it justt works and you wish you could bottle that feeling forever.

 

Inspiration is also all around us! All ages, putting their heart on the floor..which is a vulnerable thing to do, but so rewarding. I have so much joy watching others share with us their growth as dancers, everyones dance is constantly changing and growing.

 

I dance because I have to, it’s coded into my DNA. I don’t care if I am the most talented dancer(haha God knows i’m not), but it is one of the things in life that makes my heart come alive. I encourage everyone to find what it is that inspires you to be the best YOU, embrace it and enjoy it with all you are. That was my attempt to share  why I dance, and why I will always  dance.

 

“You don’t stop dancing because you grow old,

you grow old because you stop dancing.” Author Unkown

 

Thanksgiving Challenge: Magnify the beauty.

“One of the most poisonous of all Satan’s whispers is simply, “Things will never change.” That lie kills expectation, trapping our heart forever in the present. To keep desire alive and flourishing, we must renew our vision for what lies ahead. Things will not always be like this. Jesus has promised to “make all things new.” Eye has not seen, ear has not heard all that God has in store for his lovers, which does not mean “we have no clue so don’t even try to imagine,” but rather, you cannot outdream God. Desire is kept alive by imagination, the antidote to resignation. We will need imagination, which is to say, we will need hope. ”
― John Eldredge, The Sacred Romance Drawing Closer To The Heart Of God

“The point is the love story. We live in a love story in the midst of war.”
― John Eldredge, The Sacred Romance Drawing Closer To The Heart Of God

There have been so many negative things happening lately, that I feel quite a pull to try and counteract it with some ounce of joy.  Violence, accidents, words of hate,  natural disasters, political and economic upheaval,,it’s hard to deny that a great shadow of darkness seems to be trying to invade this phase in history. I know, that I can get so caught up in my own life, I forget to look at the bigger picture. We are in a war: for our freedom of life,  joy, for LOVE, for our hearts, for our spirits and for our morals.   Are we willing..to look “beyond the grey” and see that if we do not fight for light..for life…we like those in Narnia cursed by the evil witch ..will be stuck in an eternal winter of the heart. Simply because evil surrounds, darkness rises, that doesn’t mean they will be victorious.  Realize you are loved…by God, He have everything to love us and to set us free from our chains. We are His soldiers, to fight this great darkness. I recently got into the Harry Potter series (haha go ahead and laugh, I’m a late bloomer i know) , and was so fascinated by this fierce struggle against good and evil, and how it truly is similar to a battle we all face nowadays.  In the story, Voldermort (the ultimate character of evil and darkness) is slowly becoming more and more powerful, and  the only thing that is standing in his way, is the “boy who lived”  Harry (a representation of good determined to overcome Evil no matter what), and Harry is fiercely opposed in almost every way possible, and he sacrifices everything (with the help of his friends) to conquer the evil lord. In the end hate..cannot compare to the strength of LOVE.  We applaud stories like this..maybe because deep inside we know we are a battle quite like Harry’s.  (my geeking out moment is over) Will we let darkness rise without a fight?? I hope not! It’s thanksgiving…be thankful for the JOY, for how LOVED you are, and take the “Voldemort’s” in your life and in the world around you, and with God’s help, dare to blast out the darkness with some light, some joy. Find the beauty that surrounds you and magnify it!  Life is too short…to not have it be meaningful. <3

“If I don’t stand for something. I’ll fall for everything.”

“This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. Hide it under a bushel ? NO!”  haha

Happy Thanksgsiving <3

So much more…

“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
― C.S. Lewis, Weight of Glory and Other Addresses

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.”
― C.S. Lewis

Have you ever heard the phrase “there is a God shaped hole in all of us”, well as cheesy as that sounds..it’s really quite accurate. I know from my own experiences…we are trying to find something to satisfy a desire somewhere deep inside of our hearts. “I can’t get no satisfaction” has become our anthem. We get momentary satisfaction…and we keep chasing after it. Like the woman at the well, Jesus said to her, “if you drink from my water..you will never thirst again.” she instantly wanted what he offered…it’s exhausting searching, trying, failing,losing ourselves, moving on from one thing to the next…..this is no new groaning…King Solomon knew of our pain when he wrote: 2 “Meaningless! Meaningless!”
says the Teacher.
“Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless.”

3 What do people gain from all their labors
at which they toil under the sun?
4 Generations come and generations go,
but the earth remains forever.
5 The sun rises and the sun sets,
and hurries back to where it rises.
6 The wind blows to the south
and turns to the north;
round and round it goes,
ever returning on its course.
7 All streams flow into the sea,
yet the sea is never full.
To the place the streams come from,
there they return again.
8 All things are wearisome,
more than one can say.
The eye never has enough of seeing,
nor the ear its fill of hearing.
9 What has been will be again,
what has been done will be done again;
there is nothing new under the sun.
10 Is there anything of which one can say,
“Look! This is something new”?
It was here already, long ago;
it was here before our time.
11 No one remembers the former generations,
and even those yet to come
will not be remembered
by those who follow them.”

Are we hamsters on a perpetual hamster wheel…moving.. but not going anywhere? Will we ever be happy??

John 10:10
New International Version (NIV)
“10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

Ahh but…Gods desire for us..is to have a life full of meaning…full of truth..joy..peace..not of restlessness. We must settle our own hearts…in that God is, was and will always be the only one who can fill that ache..that hole..inside of us.”You have made us for yourself, oh Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.~St. Augustine…I know that the only place I’mt truly at peace..is in the arms of my savior..I wrote this a while ago and it still stands true for me:”I dont know how to say the way I feel today, there are no words to explain, i’ve looked in every dictionary and I’m still speachless…you grabbed a hold of my heart and won’t let it go.I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared.You’ve given everything to love me.All I have to offer is broken dreams and words I cannot find.Tell me who it is I”m supposed to be..cuz I’m coming up empty.I keep finding myself at the place where you are.I’ve been denying the fact you were always the voice inside my head..telling me everything will be ok..i pushed and i shoved you away..turned the music up loud cuz I didn’y want to believe..you grabbed a hold of my heart..and you won’t let it go.”

I’m back :)

I took a break from blogging this year, as time became a precious commodity. I have been busy with working , school and all of the craziness life can bring to our plate. I miss blogging, so voila I’m back. I can by no means sum up my year thus far in one blog entry..but this will be my attempt. I have been trying to find where in life I fit. After some major soul searching, I finally found that when I completely let go..and came to the end of myself..I found I truly came alive. My perspective of the world has changed..and I feel the little child that was buried deep inside my heart, has come to surface again.She begun whispering to me the dreams I had forgotten. She always believed I could fly. I realized..when we don’t try to be who we had always wished we could be..we will never know if we can. Do you remember when you were little..and thought you could be president, a princess, a fireman, etc? Why did we stop believing we could change the world? To be an adult, that impacts the world, we have to keep the child in our hearts fully alive. Yes we have bills to pay, goals to reach….but don’t you think life is so much more than that?  God wants us to live to our fullest.

John 10:10

New International Version (NIV)

^“10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

I have fallen in love with Jesus..and life all over again. I stopped trying to analyze the reason for everything..and have faith that everything will workout.  Love every moment…every person…and be thankful for what we do have..instead of wishing for things we cannot attain. “”Be still, and know that I am God;” Psalm 46:10  Sometimes we have trials in life..we cannot begin to understand. God will hold us close…through them…if we let Him.  I am learning pride…is nothing to hold onto. We make bad choices….or other people around us make bad choices..that directly effect us, there are consequences for free will. Will we let the low moments of life..keep us from hoping? From loving? from dreaming? ahh..the beauty of life..can outweigh the bad..if we let it.  When I start looking at life as tho I am deeply loved (because I AM, by Jesus:), and live for things that will outlast this life (the eternal;)…I find right where I fit in life…in love with it..and with Jesus. <3

Confessions 2010

Confessions:2010

 Every year around this time..I find myself doing some soul searching and reflection. As I grow up (you actual grown ups, are probablly laughing as I say this) I am discovering that, who I am today, is not the same person I’m gonna be tomorrow. It doesn’t matter how much we try to hold onto the past, the present without a doubt will change our future. Life, people, circumstance, love, hate, and most importantly God, has something new to show us everyday. Sometimes what gets shown to us, is painful and other times it’s beautiful. This year, I have been shown a great deal of both beauty and pain. Sara Groves wrote it pretty well:”I saw what I saw and I can’t forget it I heard what I heard and I can’t go back I know what I know and I can’t deny it.Something on the road, cut me to the soul.”

I’m the kind of person that hates the fear of the unknown..and the one thing that I learned this year..is everytime I think I know what my future holds, I am proven wrong. I can no more control what happens to me tomorrow, more then I can control if the rain clouds work or not. Dang it.( I know that some of you reading this..may not believe in God like I do..but I hope you can understand what I’m trying to say..haha. Sorry if I’m rambling!)

But God..He is in control…and everytime I stop and see that my backseat driving doesn’t really help, I am humbled and relieved. Why do I put so much preasure on myself? How arrogant…and ridiculous is that?

1 Peter 5:7 (New International Version, ©2010)

7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

 I am so very blessed to have the life I have…the people who have entered my world this year…are truly extraordianary, beautiful, and have taught me so much about what it means to love, and to truly open up my heart. To know that someone is quite aware that you aren’t perfect…not the coolest kid around….and still cares for you..is a remarkable gift. A rare gift. A glimpse of the great love that God has for us..and desires for us to have towards one another. 

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.” C.S. Lewis

Yes..loving, and opening up, is incredibly risky…the ones that love you..can hurt you and give you the most joy..all in a matter of seconds. I’m not saying..to be scandelous with my heart. “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” Proverbs 4:23. But I am saying…loving the people in my life, is what makes my world beautiful, and worth while. Of anything I can possibly accomplish, or have accomplished, nothing is more valuable then sharing in the love that God has given me, and spreading it to everyone I meet.

John 13:34-35 ESV A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. (35) By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

 John 4:16-19 ESV So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. (17) By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. (18) There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. (19) We love because he first loved us. 

 

 I’m not gonna lie..there have been times this year..where I wondered if I had love in me to give….then God would open my eyes up to see..that I have nothing on my own strength..nothing at all…but everything I have comes from Him! holy moly…i’m prettyyy convicted as I’m writing that. haha.  Everyday is a journey..admitting my faults..and letting God repair them. We all have so many imperfections..yet the Lord still loves us, and desires for us to grow in those imperfections. Praise Him for His grace!

I don’t have life figured out by any stretch of the imagination..but I have confidence, that there is no place in life..that I can go..that God isn;t beside me..guiding me. I will stray from His clear path sometimes..my humanity fails me..but his truth brings me back every time.

2010 changed me, brought me places I never thought I’d get to go.., it was painful sometimes..but mostly it was beautiful. Thank you everyone, who took part in making it what it was..and therfore making me the person I’m gonna be tomorrow.

That’s my confessions for the year..haha..I look forward to seeing what 2011 holds, in your life and in mine. God is great!

Let’s love!

Trista

 

 

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 ESV If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. (2) And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. (3) If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.